So I started thinking about how my first pregnancy seemed to go by at a snail's pace (until those last two weeks, that is), and now I want to bring that snail's pace back as I watch our little boy grow, change, learn, and experience life daily. Take this morning for instance. Gavin was sitting at the breakfast table, thoroughly enjoying the one-on-one attention he was receiving from me, as his little sister was snoring away upstairs. He was asking questions about my doctor's appointment; why I wasn't eating any cereal with him, why they needed to take my blood, how can they tell when the baby is ready to come out, etc., etc. Just the level of conversation was kind of surreal. His questions were thoughtful and he had follow-up questions that showed me he was actually listening to what I was telling him.
Once I'd satisfied his curiosity about his sibling-to-be, Gavin moved on to telling me about how he slept. More specifically, he was telling me about his dream. Wait...what? My 4 year old was telling me about his dream. I know I've always given him a good night kiss and told him 'sweet dreams' before bed, but this morning, he filled me in on one of those very dreams. One of the first times he's done so with more detail besides, 'I had sweet dreams, mom'.
Gavin told me he had a dream about his grandpa. He said grandpa was sitting on our couch, talking with 'Miss Sue' (a dear friend of our family--practically family herself!). Gavin was sitting on the couch next to grandpa, watching TV, and on the other side of grandpa on the half wall next to the couch, there was a pizza in a pizza box.
Ok, I'm not great at figuring out the underlying meaning of dreams, and I'm not even sure if there's an explanation. But, what I did find endearing is that this little four year old boy had a dream about his grandpa who passed away last April. Living in Colorado makes it a challenge for our kids to have the same type of 'grandparent-grandchild' relationship that we did as kids. Family dinners, holidays, birthdays, and sleepovers at their houses 'just because' are not a possibility. So we make it work in other ways. We call on the phone. We email. We text. We facebook (is that a verb now?!). We blog (ok, so I blog). Anyhow, our kids have a great understanding of who their Grammy, Grandma Conley, and Grandpa Conley are. We talk about them often, and especially after losing dad last year, we have pictures of them throughout the house.
I thought about Gavin's dream this morning while driving to work. Gavin hadn't seen his Grandpa since he was about 2 years old, shortly after Brynn was born. Like I said, we have lots of photos of dad, and talk about him often. We recently have home movies that Sue ('Miss Sue' in the dream) has generously transferred onto DVD for us, so we've watched some of them. The kids understand, as best a 4 year old and a 2 year old can, that Grandpa is with God, and is an angel that looks over them. Randy and I want our kids to grow up knowing the amazing man their Grandpa was, how much he loved them. We want to keep his memory alive for not only them, but for us as well. I was teary-eyed about Gavin's dream, not just because we all miss dad terribly, but because it made me realize that although Grandpa's with God, in our kids' eyes, he is still a very prominent figure in their lives (ours too, obviously).
I wish I could have watched this dream unfold, as it would be great to 'see' dad. I've dreamed of him before, and it was a very calming thing to see him in my dreams, and talk to him. But I'm so glad that Gavin was able to dream about him. I'm even more grateful for the fact that he's old enough to comprehend the fact that he was dreaming, remember the dream, and share it with us. I guess it's ok that he's growing up faster than a snail's pace...it's kind of fun to have a little guy who's developing his understanding for how the world works.
 |
| Grandpa and Gavin |
 |
| Grandpa and Brynn |
 |
| Gavin's first Christmas, playing with Grandpa |
 |
| Four generations of Conley men |
No comments :
Post a Comment