Monday, December 5, 2011

I want my mommy!

*Exhale*

My goodness...the past few weeks in our household have been thoroughly exhausting.  At this point, I can't even recall the order of events, but I know that we've experienced ear infections (single and double), head cold(s), stomach bug, pnuemonia, RSV, and the.worst.sinus.infection.ever.

Most of this, of course, occurred in the midst of an incredibly busy time in Randy's work schedule, which means he was not home.  I can't imagine working the schedule that he does...especially when he had about two dozen jobs in two weeks.  Ex-hausted.

Thankfully, the baby's RSV/pneumonia combination that hit late at night just-so-happened to be in the small pocket of time that Randy was home and sleeping, so I was able to just take her to the ER, rather than drag the circus along with me.  We're also thankful that the baby's illnesses were not severe enough to be hospitalized. 

Once all of the kids started getting better (fingers crossed), the delightful little germs that were festering in our house (despite the cans of Lysol and containers of disinfectant wipes) found their way to me.  And they were not nice. 

The past week has been quite a fog, courtesy of the sinus medicine, Mucinex, cold and flu caplets, and NyQuil I have consumed.  Saturday morning was my breaking point.  I awoke to the feeling of wanting to rip the right side of my face off.  I simply could not take the false sense of relief provided by the OTC meds any longer, and needed the assistance of some prescription miracle. 

Shockingly, Randy had to work.  Added to the mix of *fun things* I had to deal with, was snow.  I bundled the three munchkins into snow gear, wrapped myself in a scarf and coat, threw a hat upon my unwashed head of hair, ran the mascara wand over each of my eyelashes, and headed out into the white and slippery abyss. 

The kids were under strict direction to 'not-touch-anything!' while at the doctor's office.  As Gavin put it, 'our house has enough germs, we don't need any more'.  Amen, sweet boy, amen.  Shortly after we walked in the door, a man walked in, and I overheard him telling the girls at the front desk that he needed stitches--somehow he had put his elbow into the snowblower.  Needless to say, his stupidity (I'm sorry, curiousity?) took presedence over my swollen face. 

Sidebar: this *near* exact same thing happened a year ago.  I was in the exact same waiting room, awaiting relief from a sinus infection, when in walks a man who informs the front desk that he needs stitches--apparently he stuck his fingers in the snowblower. 

Am I joking?  No.  Did I think I was on some hidden camera show?  Yes.

We waited about 30 more minutes, the baby was screaming, Brynn was whining, and Gavin kept dropping the Legos I let him bring to play with (in his lap), causing me to use all the hand sanitizing wipes I had in my purse.

Our next stop was Target, to fill my prescription, and shop for some necessitities.  The snow was not subsiding, making the trek through the parking lot *delightful*.  By the end of the trip, our cart was overflowing with everything that took up an exorbitant amount of space (paper towels, toilet paper, multi-packs of tissues, and diaper boxes), which made that trek throught parking lot even more *delightful*. 

Our journey was only half over.  A quick lunch and a basketball game for Gavin still loomed on the horizon of my rapidly increasing sinus-pain-and-pressure filled day.  All I wanted was the medicine to kick in.  A nap.  And my mommy.

Before I began feeling sick last Monday, I had been coping.  We had made last-minute doctor's visits, late night doctor's visits, even later night pharmacy runs, and middle of the night emergency room visits.  We had been through about a dozen different medicines, some OTC, some prescription.  We had had sleepless nights filled with discomfort and tears.  We had missed days of school and work, hastily written sub plans while simultaneously keeping a baby from screaming and helping a 5 year old as he gets sick into a trash can.  We had to clean up the floor at our friend's house after an upset tummy became *really* upset.  Twice.  (Sorry, Sue!)  We had exhaustion and uncertainty, fevers and chills, running noses and horrible coughs.  And through it all, I pretty much kept my cool.  Ok, sure.  I did let the tears flow while waiting at the pharmacy one late night, thus giving opportunity for the pharmacist to show compassion and fill my order within minutes and hand deliver it, along with my credit card receipt, to me as I sat in the chair, after having collapsed in sheer exhaustion.  But I got myself together and got my children all home and safely tucked into their beds.

Then, my nightmare-ish week of cold/flu/sinus disaster began.  And, for some reason, I couldn't handle the pressure.  I became grumpy and short-tempered.  I was distant and whiny.  I was weak.  Why was I able to handle the gamut of sickness that had been thrown at me by my children, yet my own sickness appeared to be my own un-doing?

Thankfully today, I began to experience the joy of sinus pressure relief.  Feelings of normalcy began to overtake my being, and I finally finished the Christmas decorating that had been staring at me from across the room all week long as I lay on the couch, near death. 

I can't help but think how selfish I've been in the past week.  My miserable attitude was a completely unnecessary added *bonus* that Randy had to deal with, in addition to trying to re-cuperate from an insanely busy stretch of work (just in time to go back on call and start the whole routine over again). 

I know that Randy's schedule makes it a challenge for me to be able to rely on his help on a consistent matter.  And, because of that, I need to be stronger, be able to manage, cope, and keep calm. 

But sometimes, a girl just needs her mommy.

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